Soulless

My mother just came into the house crying. I looked at her and for one second I felt bad for her and then it went away and I went on with my business. I can not believe that that actually happened because I really thought I cared about her more than that. When any of my friends are upset I get upset and when they cry it makes me want to cry. It's weird that my mother can not phase me in the least bit. I guess it's really no surprise to me that it doesn't bother me because I always say I don't care about her, but I honestly thought I cared more...
My second thought after not caring was that she finally got a taste of her own medicine. For once in her life she is helplessly upset. There are so many times in my life when I have been upset and she has seen it and hasn't cared and there are also times when she has told me she doesn't care. She has told me my dad didn't care about me when my friend was there. THIS is probably why I don't care. This is why I am never upset around her anymore. This is why I don't speak to her. I can't even be sympathetic towards her. Because we have NO relationship and there's NOTHING I can do about it. I just don't even know what to think right now except for I wish I cared because not caring is not like me at all. Not caring about someone makes me feel inferior to myself.