Movie.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3nA9AG1AWk

Yeah...I want to see it.

Iris.

I can't believe one person can make you re-think so many things about what you are and what you think. I'm not saying this is a bad thing at all, it's just crazy to me. The whole going back and forth on love thing is really getting annoying. I wish I could just know what I think about it and the more I'm with him the more my mind goes in the opposite direction than it has in the past. I have actually been pretty happy and it is the weirdest thing to feel like someone cares about me. In fact, it's hard to let someone care about me. I know that might sounds weird but I feel like someone just has to tear my guard down sometimes to get to me. I wish I could just let people care. I think I have spent so much time building up my defense wall that I can't even get past it. I am trying really hard to let him in more and more. I want to let people care. More than anything. As much as I am scared shitless when people care, I feel more safe than I have ever felt since my dad died.

"And I don't want the world to see me, cause I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know WHO I AM"

love you.

fkjaklfjas COURAGE fkihfak COURAGE

This weekend for Thanksgiving I went to visit Julianne in Tennessee. As much as it did not feel like Thanksgiving, it was really nice to get away from everything that is Webster Groves. We just chilled out and caught up. We watched so many movies it wasn't even funny. She made me watch Twilight and then drug me to see New Moon. Which I will admit really wasn't as bad as I thought it would be and I defintely enjoyed going. Robert Pattinson and Taylor Laughter and their sexyness really made the movie. lol :) I was also introduced to Charlie Bartlett and Ellen Degeneres stand up comedy. ELLEN. IS. SO. FUNNY. She is so right about so many things. We walked around Knoxville a bit and walked around Market Square which is super cute--especially with all of the Christmas stuff going around. I also inherited some money with Michael Jackson's face on it and it talked about God and your eternity on the back. haha. Anyways, I am really happy that I got to go this weekend. I feel refreshed and more accepting about having to work my ass off for the rest of the semester. :)

In other news:
WEBSTER WON STATE!!!! 31-14! KICK. ASS. Whoohoo!

_________________________________________________________________

I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you

I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you

Life

This is the moment

It's on the line

Which way you're gonna fall

In the middle

Between wrong and right

But you know afterall



It's your life

Whatcha gonna do

The world is watching you

Everyday the choices you make

Say what you are

and who your heart beats for

Its an open door



It's your life

Are you who you

Always said you would be

With a sinking feeling in your chest

Always waiting

On someone else to fix you

Tell me when do you forget



It's your life

Whatcha gonna do

The world is watching you

Everyday the choices you make

Say what you are

and who your heart beats for

Its an open door



You can live the way you believe

This is your opportunity

To let your life be one that lights the way



Francesca Battistelli - It's Your Life

Confusion

Yeah so, you know that whole "love" thing I have posted about in the past. I think it is now confusing me more than ever. I guess I should just accept the fact that it always will and whether I believe in it or not I should just have some fun and think about it minimally.

Oh, by the way, tonight was pretty good. I'm not gonna lie. The DJ sucked, but whatevs. Afterwards was prettty much amazing too. :]

And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
'Cause sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive

And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am

I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am
I just want you to know who I am

Just another day

So while I have the time to blog I might as well say something about my life that's worth reading. So since I've last blogged a lot has happened.

- The Wizard of Oz is over which is a really good thing and at the same time it's not so. I feel extremely relieved that it's over even though I kind of miss the good things about it. I miss all the challenges it through at me but I don't miss the stress that it caused. I did inherit a mouse though. His name is Wizard. :] We're pretty tight, I'm not gonna lie.
- Laura and I are both resigning from being Thespian officers due to many reasons and I never thought this would happen but at the same time I think it is a necessary thing. I used to be completely in love with thespians and now it's just another pain in my back and the reason I did it in the first place was to have fun with theatre and we're not doing any theatre so it's a waste of my time. I will not put the rest on here just because I don't really want to and it will just frustrate me.
- The friendship dance is tonight and I'm going with Asa and we are dragging Joanna along. lol. We are trying to stop her from being a bum and sitting alone and we are succeeding lol. I am really excited to go to the dance. I need a night of fun and not thinking and I'm hoping tonight will be the night. I really need a night that doesn't involve a lot of thinking because I have been doing way to much of it lately. And I don't see any sort of a drunk night coming any time soon so really tonight has to be my escape.
- My grades kind of suck balls right now. the end.
- Even though I've been stressed out and not wanting to deal with shit lately, I can't help but smile sometimes. There's just been some really good things going on--I wont go into detail on here though since I think some family reads this. haha sorryyy.